I'm fine

I'm fine

Sunday 4 January 2009

another year

well another year is over
and another one begins,
yet it seems same old here,
ive not slept when its been dark for a few weeks now
My head is pickled,
my head is in the shed
and its truly lost and hiding
Im waiting patiently in it all falling into place,
I just hope i dont miss it,

Flashbacks are so evil, so debilitating and so damn real
Im sure once i talk it all through, it will be easier
I hope once i talk it all trhough it will be easier

Its seem such a shame to start the year like this
feeling like this, thinking like this,
starting it with a heavy heart
though in a way its not a bad thing as
the only way can be up,
things can only get better
And i know it can,

I dont know wot to write to make it feel better
I dont know wot to say,
im stuck here for now, and for now i need to accept
Accept that hard work is needed on my part,
Accept that i cant change the past, just my views of it

About Me

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Im a women who is slowly learning to survive, who is taking a journey into the past in order to gain a future. I have ptsd, bpd and suicidal ideation. I often wander if i would have any of that if it wasn't for the mess, the past.