I'm fine

I'm fine

Sunday 5 August 2018

Saturday 4 August 2018

Bitter little pill

Anxiety is going to be the death of me

Im so anxious I feel sick, I'm flipping between them and now, now and then and it's killing me
I've tried to stop organising my plan, sorting stuff out but the longer I don't do it the more anxious I become then when I do do it I become even more anxious so I'm anxious when I'm not planning and I'm anxious when I am

I'm scared because I know I don't want this then Im scared because I think I do
I'm exhausted beyond what I thought possible I'm functioning at a level lower than acceptable

I'm so tired I want to sleep to forget to rest to wake up ready to fight this again a I do is fight this but it's never enough fight even when I give more fight than I thought possible I still can't seem to conquer this my most is never enough

It figures as I'm shit at most things I put my hand to so It figures I'm.shit at this too
I need to go to sleep now as I can't see out my eyes properly and my head hurts so much yet I bet I'm awake In a half hour full of his pain and my hurt.

About Me

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Im a women who is slowly learning to survive, who is taking a journey into the past in order to gain a future. I have ptsd, bpd and suicidal ideation. I often wander if i would have any of that if it wasn't for the mess, the past.